Ever have something happen to you that at first you’re all “well WHAT THE HECK?!” and then after you’re all “Oh. Okay God I see what you did there.” I had a weekend like that… •
On Friday my adorable pain in the ass toddler decided to chuck a bowl of Cheerios across our kitchen and in my attempt to intercept them, I jammed my little innocent toe right into my five month olds jumperoo. I CRIED. And I may have used a few superlatives I’m not proud of but it felt warranted at the time. I hopped around on one foot, trying to manage my day and basically figure out what was to happen in the next 24hrs. You see in those 24hrs I had already many important, or what I thought was important, things planned. And once I knew I was going to have to cancel everything because I couldn’t even walk to the bathroom, I was PISSED. I was angry at Hanalei, angry that I had this stupid jumperoo attack my toe, angry that we had stupid stuff laying all over the place, angry that I couldn’t just get away to work like I felt I needed to, angry for being stupid and clumsy… you get it. I was angry. •
But I had something else happen. I was off the hook for a few days and could just be a hobblin’ mama. With no responsibilities to anything but my aching toe, and my family. To be honest, it was odd at first. Then it was freeing. And God spoke so clearly to my heart during this time. Saying, “it won’t always be like this. And that’s okay. I love you and I want you to enjoy this time.” Now I’m not saying God caused me to be a clutz and forcibly thrusted my toe into Gwendolyn’s jumperoo, BUT He did take that time and made it good. He made it sweet. I suffer from terrible mom guilt if I spend more time in one area of my life over another. And God used this situation to show me that I don’t need to be 100% wife, 100% mom and 100% boss all the time. That HE makes the focuses and priorities in my life purposeful. HE will guide my days so that I focus on what HE wants me to focus on. And through that HE will show me that sometimes, it’s okay to just be Wife. Just be Boss. Just be Mom. And I’m so grateful for that peace.